Batman VS John Wick
Batman VS John Wick is a What-If? episode of Death Battle. It features the return of Batman from DC Comics and John Wick from his eponymous movie. Description DC Comics VS John Wick! The Dark Knight battles the vengeful hitman in a no-holds barred showdown! With only standard equipment and no time to prepare, will Batman be able to put an end to Wick's blood-lusted rampage? Interlude Wiz: Death. Whether it be a close friend or a family member, death is not a nice thing to experience. It may cause someone to mourn and not act like themselves for a long time, but in... other cases, death makes someone go out on a long quest for revenge, in some way or another. And these two combatants do just that. Boomstick: Bruce Wayne, the Batman... Wiz: And John Wick, the hitman with a vengeance. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick! Wiz: And it's our job to analyse their weapons, armour and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle. Batman Wiz: Batman is the Dark Knight, defender of Gotham City and harbinger of justice. But before he became the stuff of criminal nightmares, he was Bruce Wayne, an ordinary son to the billionaires Thomas and Martha Wayne. One fateful event would turn Bruce's life around forever... A gunshot is heard. Boomstick: When he was only 8 years old, he was suddenly an orphan as his parents were killed by a common thug right in front of his face. That must have been one cursed opera. With this, he soon decided that he should the dedicate the rest of life to beating the everliving crap out of the criminal underworld! Wiz: And he really worked hard to get himself to the position he is at today - pushed to the physical limits of the human body, bench-pressing 1,000lbs and having incredibly sharp reflexes. Boomstick: As well as achieving 12 master degrees, studying 127 martial arts, and perfecting escape-artistry. With enough time and effort, he can escape any kind of trap. So he's not just Houdini, he's also a bit of a bookworm! Wiz: But Batman's physical prowess isn't the only thing he has to rely on. Using the Wayne family fortune, he was able to get himself a bat-like suit of armour... appropriately called the Batsuit. Boomstick: While it looks pretty silly in practice, at least to me, turns out this kit is a handy piece of equipment! The memory cloth cape allows him to glide through the air, and it's also capable of stopping most knives and gunfire. It's also equipped with blade gauntlets and also houses a neat taser-like network covering his entire suit that'll shock anyone on touch... at least when it's active. Wiz: But to get him through and out of most situations, he has a multitude of gadgets equipped on his utility belt. Though the gadgets themselves change depending on the situation Batman is prepared for, there are a standard set of tools he carries, such as a gas mask, tear gas, smoke pellets, explosive gel, plastic explosives, and his trademark tools, his grapple gun and his collapsible shurikens, also known as... Boomstick: The good ol' fashioned batarangs! These are his razor-sharp long range weapons for neutralising his foes, and he's got different types, such as the electric and grenade types! Wiz: While Batman has the build and power of an Olympic athlete, his greatest achievements come from his skills in his line of detective work, solving multiple crimes claimed to be unsolvable and constantly thwarting the schemes of The Joker and his cronies. He's also capable of anticipating attacks through muscle movement alone. Boomstick: He's a founding member of the team of superheroes known as the Justice League, and he's the only non-powered founder to boot! He's also survived scrapes such as Bane's "Thanks-For-Sparing-Me-So-I'll-Crush-Your-Spine" gesture, even though it put him out of commission for a year, as well as fighting various members of the Justice League... hey, didn't he beat Superman one time? Wiz: Well... kind of, but not really. Though Batman did seem to hold his own, he had prep time, Kryptonite and out-of-character bias writing on his side, Superman's reluctance to actually fight, and if that wasn't enough, it was actually Green Arrow who shot a Kryptonite arrow into Superman to bring him to his knees and Batman declared victory... before faking a heart attack before the Man of Steel could object. In short... he cheated. Boomstick: Bastard! That's not the way of the Batman! Wiz: Which brings me to another point - a lot of Batman's accomplishments take a lot of prep time to achieve, varying the time depending on the task at hand. Boomstick: But prep time or not, it's hard to not get intimidated by him! There's a reason criminals everywhere in Gotham City fear Batman! Wiz: Why? Boomstick: Because he's the god-damn Batman! Batman: Sometimes the truth isn't good enough, sometimes people deserve more. Sometimes people deserve to have their faith rewarded. John Wick Wiz: Jonathan Wick was once the best assassin under Viggo Tarasov's crime syndicate. As a former Marine, he was one of the deadliest around, whom of which eliminated all of Viggo's competition on his way to the top. An accomplishment Viggo describes as "impossible". Boomstick: God damn! Wiz: Upon falling in love with a woman named Helen, who would soon be his wife, Wick retired from Viggo's syndicate to live with her, until her untimely death to an unknown disease. Wick would have been alone... Boomstick: But as an after-death gift, Wick's wife gave him a puppy called Daisy, whom of which Wick would use to comfort himself and control his sadness and mourning for the loss of his wife. He'd cherish the pup and even take it out for wild rides in his Mustang. Ah, talk about livin' the good life... John Wick (to Daisy): You liked that, huh? Wiz: Unfortunately, Wick would soon find himself to have a problem. Upon arriving at a gas station, he encountered a trio of Russian gangsters, led by Iosef Tarasov, whom of which wanted Wick's car. Upon refusing to sell the car, they followed Wick back to his house and broke in during the night to attack Wick. They killed Daisy and stole the car anyway. Boomstick: And boy, oh boy, would that turn out to be their biggest mistake ever! Wiz: After burying Daisy, he decided to get revenge against Iosef and his former employer's cronies for killing his dog. Boomstick: So he decided to shoot everything in his path up for them killing his pet named Daisy... is he related to Doomguy!? Viggo: It's not what you did, son, that angers me so... It's who you did it to. Iosef: Who? That fucking nobody? Viggo: That "fucking" nobody is John Wick. Boomstick: Despite Johnny knowing his way through all kinds of guns, close-quarters combat and gun-fu, he does have his favourites! His go-to weapon of choice is his Heckler and Koch P30L pistol, which most of his kills in his revenge plot came from! His other guns include a Glock 26 pistol, a Coharie Arms CA-415 assault rifle, a DTA Stealth Recon Scout sniper rifle, a run-of-the-mill knife, and his beautiful Kel-Tec KSG shotgun! As Boomstick lists off each weapon, Wick performs a kill with the mentioned weapon. Wiz: Interestingly enough, he seemed to find some of these under the ground... which Wick used a sledgehammer to break into. Boomstick: Just like how I get my guns! ...Hey, wait a minute... Wiz: John is as tough as they come... rather, tougher. He has a total of 342 confirmed kills in his line of work, with a further 86 unconfirmed kills, and in his revenge plot against Iosef and Viggo alone, killed 77 people. Even before these events, he was Viggo's best assassin, having eliminated all of his competition single-handedly to get Viggo to the top. He's also said to be... very deadly with even the most mundane of objects. Viggo: In a bar, I once saw him kill three men... with a pencil. Boomstick: Talk about the pen being mightier than the sword! But he's not just an expert hitman! He is one tough normal, having fended off a female assassin while one of his arms was in a sling! No matter how hurt he gets, he'll keep pushing forward until he's done! Wiz: However, this does mean his mental stability is concerning at best, and due to his length of retirement, he was pretty rusty in his ability, having been neutralised a number of times by Viggo's squad. But eventually, he got his groove back, overcame the entire syndicate and got revenge. Boomstick: And this left the world with a solid reminder; Never kill a man's dog! John Wick: People keep asking if I'm back and I haven't really had an answer, but yeah, I'm thinking I'm back! Intermission Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all! Boomstick: It's time for a DEATH BATTLEEEEEEEE!!! DEATH BATTLE! AgentHoxton Somewhere in Gotham City Night-time in Gotham City had fallen. A dark vehicle pulled up to the front of a hotel building. To unaware folk, it would have looked like a tank-like vehicle had just rolled up. But anyone who had lived in Gotham City long enough would recognise the vehicle in a heartbeat. The door opened, and out stepped a caped hero, wearing his iconic bat-shaped suit, cape included. This combined with the bat shape on his chest and stoic stature meant only one thing - the arrival of Batman. He listened into police scanners and looked at an unknown device in his hand that told him of his objective for the night - find and neutralise the ruthless rampaging hitman, John Wick. And according to GPS devices, this appeared to be the hotel where he was at. He was about to prepare himself when he suddenly heard a gunshot coming from the building. With no time to lose, Batman raced into the building, ready to intercept Wick. (Cue Batman: Arkham Origins - Deathstroke) Slightly higher up in the hotel building, Wick was in a fight with an assassin who was trying to kill him - one half of his face was completely disfigured - as if two people had been mashed up into one - and was wielding a pistol. Wick himself had his Heckler and Koch drawn as Harvey Dent, also known as Two-Face, approached Wick. "The toss told me that you are going down by my hand, Wick." Dent told him in a distorted voice as he approached. Wick kept himself aware, not afraid to shoot if he had to. And he very well would have done, if a shadow lurking in the back of the room didn't catch his attention. "What are you looking at?" Two-Face asked him, before turning around and noticing Batman's shadow. Dent's eyes widened as Batman revealed himself, punching Harvey in the face and knocking him out. He then approached Wick and got into a fight pose. John Wick pointed his pistol at the Dark Knight. "Get out of my way." Wick growled in warning. Batman didn't move, irritating the hitman. "Don't tempt me to shoot." He continued to warn him. Batman decided to throw a batarang at Wick, who dodged the shuriken. Wick stood back up straight as he realised he was going to have to fight. "Alright then, pal." Wick said, cracking his knuckles. "Looks like you give me no choice." Wick got into a combat stance with his pistol at the ready, as Batman regained his combat stance too. FIGHT! (Cue John Wick - Shots Fired) John Wick fires his pistol rapidly at Batman in an attempt to drive him away. Batman uses his arm to shield himself from the bullets as the Batsuit took the brunt of the shots. John Wick empties the clip and loads another magazine, which Batman uses the opportunity to walk forward to Wick and deliver a punch to the face. Wick responds by smashing the gun against Batman's head, knocking him back slightly. Batman goes for a kick that Wick dodges before the Dark Knight tries another punch, which Wick blocks with his arm, using the opportunity to kick Batman in the chest, knocking him back across the room. Batman gets back up and throws two batarangs at Wick, who rolled behind cover as they smashed the windows. Batman ran off in pursuit as Wick throws the pistol to one side, instead getting out his CA-415 assault rifle. He got behind a pillar, ready to anticipate Batman coming around the corner. Batman walked carefully through the room, ready to strike at any opportunity. Batman approached the pillar and realized that Wick was there. Wick suddenly sprang out and shot relentlessly at Batman. The Dark Knight jumped back to avoid the gunfire and threw an explosive batarang at the floor, just short of Wick. Wick looked at him as if to say "What the hell was that?" before the batarang beeped and exploded, destroying that part of the room and knocking Wick through a window further into the building. Batman pursues Wick as he gets back onto his feet, grabbing his assault rifle again. Wick spots Batman and shoots at him some more, and Batman shields his face again as he throws a smoke pellet at Wick's feet. The smoke engulfs the room as Wick tries to see through the smoke with no success. Wick waits for an opening, but suddenly Batman emerges in the smoke and grabs Wick's assault rifle. After a brief struggle, Batman is able to wrench the rifle out of Wick's hands and smashes Wick across the face with the gun, knocking him back. John Wick runs to Batman and, shown in his perspective, Wick attempts to punch the Dark Knight, who dodges it and punches the hitman in the face himself. John staggers back, clutching his face before noticing that Batman is approaching him again. The two struggle at each other before Wick notices Batman's utility belt. He scans over the equipment before adjusting his position against the Dark Knight, grabbing a canister and remote and stuffing it in his pockets and punching Batman in the head to knock him away again. Batman decides to activate his shock gloves temporarily as he ran to John, attempting to punch him with his electrified gloves, but Wick is able to dodge every punch and pulls out his Glock, shooting Batman twice in the stomach before smashing the gun over Batman's head. Though the Batsuit helped prevent most of the damage, Batman staggered back before throwing another batarang at Wick, this time catching him on the side of his waist. Wick puts his hand over where the batarang connected before shooting at Batman's head. While the Batsuit saved the Dark Knight's life, he fell down to the floor as a result of the shot. Batman gets back to his feet once again as Wick reloads. Batman races towards Wick once again to throw a punch at him, which Wick blocks. The two exchange blows before Wick grabs Batman, hoisting him over his head and throwing him to the ground. As Batman got up, Wick shoulder-charged into him, knocking him through another window, causing him to fall out of the hotel. Before the Dark Knight hit the street, he brought out his grapple gun and fired it up at the window he fell out of, quickly pulling himself back into the building. However, when Batman got inside again, Wick had gone. Batman looked around for him, but then he felt as if he knew where to search, walking through the building again and concealing himself in the shadows. He continued to search until he saw the dead body of Two-Face bleeding out on the floor, as well as a message written on the wall nearby in a grey sort of substance. "EVERYTHING HAS A PRICE". Batman stared at the message. From further down the corridor, Wick was watching from around a corner, waiting for something to happen. And eventually, he noticed Batman had walked out of the shadows to investigate this cryptic message. Batman stared at the message before he looked to his right, where he noticed that Wick had revealed himself further down the corridor, holding a remote. Batman had a sudden realisation on what the message was written with. His own explosive gel. (Cue Batman: Arkham Origins - Assassins) He had no time to run to Wick and attack as he pressed the detonation button, meaning he had to cover himself in his own cape as the gel message let off a medium-sized explosion that threw him out of the building again. This time, Batman couldn't pull himself up in time as he smashed straight into a parked car on the street below. Wick, whom of which was knocked back by the explosion as well, ditches the remote and the explosive gel and gets his DTA Stealth Recon Scout sniper rifle out as he walks to the hole created by the blast. Back in the street, Batman slowly pulls himself out of the wreckage of the car he landed on as Wick gets out of the building, jumping onto one of the metal balconies and taking aim at Batman. Batman looks up and spots Wick, throwing some explosive batarangs at the hitman. Wick shoots one of them out of the sky and rolls out of the way of the others as they explode behind him. Wick climbs down to a lower balcony and shoots at Batman's head, who rolls out of the way of the shot. Wick aims at Batman again, shooting him in the neck. The Dark Knight flinches as he feels over where the bullet impacted on his Batsuit. Wick throws the sniper rifle down as he pulls out his Kel-Tec KSG shotgun and jumped down to the street below, rolling out before getting back on his feet, ready for the final confrontation. Batman fired his grapple gun at Wick, who shot the hook with his shotgun to redirect the hook up into the air. Wick then gets his knife and slices at the rope, cutting it and rendering the grapple gun useless. The two dark-clad fighters then ran at each other and engaged in a close-range fight, with Wick trying to use his knife to cut through Batman, with the Batsuit resisting the damage of the knife. Batman tried to deflect Wick's blows before Wick manages to nick Batman's lower face with the knife, creating a cut near his mouth. Wick then locks his arms around Batman and throws him to the ground again, and attempts to stab him in the mouth. Batman catches Wick's arms and the two struggle against each other, with Batman starting to get the upper hand as they struggle. John Wick suddenly uses one hand to punch on the end of the knife, forcing it into Batman's mouth and cutting into it. Wick repeatedly punches the knife's end as Batman's mouth bleeds, before the downed hero suddenly grabbed Wick's arm and snapped it. Wick yelled in pain as he tried to break out. As the two struggled under their injuries, Wick picks up his KSG shotgun from nearby and forces the barrel into Batman's mouth, pulling the trigger. Batman's head pretty much splattered over the street and released his grip on Wick's arm as Wick was launched back slightly from the force of the shot. John Wick was breathing heavily from the adrenaline as he got back up onto his feet slowly and dusted himself down. He was just about to leave the dead body of the Dark Knight behind as he went for his Dodge Charger, parked just ahead of the Batmobile, when a voice stopped him. "Well, now, wasn't that such a display?" Wick turned to spot a man in a purple suit with green hair and a whitened face, as if someone had just escaped from the circus. He stepped towards John Wick, twirling a knife of his own in his hands. "I was kind of hoping you'd spare him for me to talk to, but I suppose there's no stopping you, Mr. Wick. Anyway, perhaps we could form an allegiance? I know your dog is so precious, and it'd be a shame if something were to happen to i--" BANG! The Joker was cut off by Wick shooting him in the head with his shotgun. Wick stared down at the body of the bleeding clown man with sweat dripping down his face. "Sorry, but I'm not for hire. Especially for people like you." Wick commented in a deadpan manner before turning back to his car, ready to leave. He was done here, and he had to go mend his wounds. K.O! As John Wick gets into his Dodge Charger, ready to leave, he notices a depressed-looking kid wrapped in bandages and leaning on crutches, looking at the carnage that had just unfolded before looking over to the hitman. "A-are those people going to be okay?" he asked. "I wouldn't bet on it, kid." Wick replied with a head shake, before shutting the door and driving off, leaving the injured boy to look on. Results Boomstick: Awww, F**K D**K SH*T C*CK F**KING GOD-DAMN D**K F**KING SON OF A SH*T BISCUIT! WHY did Batman just HAVE to lose again!? Wiz: ...Yeaaaah... but... here's why. Batman may be the superior physical fighter of the two and had the better armour, but unfortunately his arsenal lacks any real threat. Most of Batman's gadgets are utility items as opposed to tools of combat, though the batarangs and smoke pellets definitely helped the most. Not that it would do too much against such a determined opponent that he would continue to fight under his pain, such as when he continued to fight while wounded from a gunshot in a nightclub and fought off a female assassin while he had an arm in a sling. Boomstick: Seriously? Wick only has loads of guns on his side! They wouldn't be that good at taking Batman down! Wiz: It's true, Batman's armour is bullet-resistant. But there's a big difference between bullet resistance and being bulletproof entirely, and with enough shots, Wick could be able to penetrate Batman's armour. Not to mention that the lack of lethal tools on Batman's end was actually intentional on Batman's part, as he usually does not kill and designed his tools this way in case he's taken over by a malicious force, so that he doesn't break his oath to not kill. Boomstick: Fair enough... but John Wick's just a hitman! How did Batman lose to him when he beat the Justice League on his own? Wiz: Many of those feats and accomplishments take varying degrees of prep time and planning to accomplish, which Death Battle doesn't allow in one-on-one surprise encounters. Batman is less able to pull these kind of feats off in an impromptu situation, whereas Wick is capable of dealing with sudden attacks on the fly - a factor that helped him deal with Batman's stealth. Bear in mind that if we had given Batman prep time, John Wick would have got prep time as well. And despite Batman having the better physicality and combat knowledge, Wick's more ruthless brutality approach was able to overwhelm him, being unlike any gun-wielder the Dark Knight has dealt with before. Boomstick: This fight sure was Wick-ed! Wiz: The winner is John Wick. Who would you be rooting for? Batman John Wick Category:What-If? Death Battles Category:Death Battles with a returning combatant Category:AgentHoxton Category:'Hero vs. Anti-Hero' themed Death Battles Category:Completed What-If? Death Battles Category:Death Battles with Music Category:What-If? Death Battles completed in 2015